


Of Gnomes And Their Catapults

by JaneyKatherineHummingbird



Series: Star Trek Reader Inserts [33]
Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Fantasy crossover, Gen, Goblins, Scotty is a gnome, reader has cool spells
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2019-01-07 20:02:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12239715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneyKatherineHummingbird/pseuds/JaneyKatherineHummingbird
Summary: On the run from marauding goblins, Reader gets helped out by a clever gnome. Fantasy AU.





	Of Gnomes And Their Catapults

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because I’ve been watching a lot of Critical Role and listening to various DnD podcasts.

You ducked to avoid a goblin spear hurled in your direction. Curse the creatures, where were they all coming from? There hadn’t been so many daring to come out of the mountains in decades. You muttered a spell and the goblin was blasted with a ray of light, clutching his eyes and howling, now blinded. 

“Take that, monster,” you muttered as you swung around to fend off an attack from another foe. You’d been on a simple mission in the hills, gathering herbs for the resident healer to replenish his stock and make potions, when a pack of goblins had ambushed you. You’d fought bravely and desperately, but there were at least a dozen of them and one of you, so the fight boded ill in the end. 

Loosing an arrow, you hit a goblin in the neck, who went down howling. Scrambling up the thick forest slope, you searched desperately for a tree suitable for climbing or any sort of hiding place to rest in. Sweat poured down your face, your side hurt from the exertion, and your ankle had an arrow in it. 

“Time to amp this up a bit,” you decided, concentrating your energy on another spell. Turning to the goblins, you chanted another incantation then shouted loudly, “You aren’t worthy to carry a feather, you water-boned wimp faces! Go back to your holes, foul fiends!”

Four more Goblins collapsed, clutching their heads from the psychic damage the Vicious Mockery Spell had wrought. Smiling slightly, you continued your flight, knowing you only had enough energy for one more spell before you would be spent and you would need to make it count. Much Further up the mountain there would be cave dwellings that you could seek shelter in. The gnomes that dwelt up here were quite hospitable and known enemies of goblins, who lived much farther down. 

Your deep green cloak billowed out behind you as you gathered your skirts and lept up the rock strewn slope. Just as you thought you’d made it, you tripped on a tree root and went down hard, jarring your injury and knocking the air from your lungs. Gasping, you resigned yourself to the worst as the goblins hurried toward you, yelling in glee as they readied their spears to impale you. About two meters away from you, the leader was suddenly felled by a good sized rock that appeared to be hurled out of nowhere. 

“Up this way, lass,” a voice hissed to you from above. “You don’t want to be in the way when I finish off these doomed demons.” 

Looking up an slightly to the left, you saw a small, round head poking out of an opening in the rock face. It had to be a gnome, you thought and scurried out of the path of the goblins even as another rock hurtled onto the goblins, sending them scattering. You clambered up towards, what was a very narrowly opened stone door and squeezed inside, after which the door shut tightly behind you. Slumping to the ground as your leg gave out, you turned your head to see your host busily loading another rock into what was a very ingeniously placed catapult. A small green creature was rolling more rocks into place as the gnome prepared to fire again. The mechanism released and the rock shot out, hitting more goblins apparently, judging by the excited dance and fist pumping the gnome performed. 

“That’s really ingenious,” you said admiringly when the gnome began resetting his machine. 

“Thank ye,” he said, grinning all over his round head, covered with a light layer of reddish hair. “I take great pride in my tinkering, especially when it destroys those bloody nuisances. Whatever are they doing out in broad daylight?”

“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “But they’re becoming a danger to the farmers around the village of Enteria. I was just out searching for some healing plants for a friend when they ambushed me.” 

You rearranged yourself and winced as your ankle throbbed from the movement. The gnome looked concerned.

“Ye’re hurt, Lass!”

“Took an arrow to the ankle,” you admitted. “It’ll be okay until you have those goblins finished off.”

He nodded and returned to his loading, rolling another rock onto the catapult with help from the creature, who was nothing like you’d seen before. Telepathically, you sent a message to Leonard informing him of your situation and then settled down to observe the gnome some more.

He was a very energetic fellow and judging by the contraptions scattered around, definitely prone to tinkering and inventing. It was a cozy little cave, floor softened with warg skin rugs, the walls lined with various sconces and lamps, shelves filled with jars of spirits, and boxes filled with hammers, chisels, mallets, and saws. Upon the wall near the table were tacked up crude sketches that were clearly plans for new devices and on a special shelf in the far corner, a large set of bagpipes. A closed door in the back you assumed led to his sleeping quarters. 

“That’ll teach ‘em!!” crowed the gnome. “They’ll know not to set foot within a hundred yards of Montgomery Scott’s lair or they’ll all get cracked crowns!”

“Did you finish them?” you asked hopefully. 

“Aye, I did,” he confirmed. “You’re safe now, lass.”

“Thank you so much, Master Scott” you breathed gratefully, shaking the gnome’s offered hand. It was a bit rough and greasy, but that seemed fitting for his occupation.

“You’re very welcome,” he replied warmly. “And please, Call me Scotty. Let’s see about that hurt leg and then we’ll figure out how to get you home safely.” 

“Sounds like a good plan,” you whispered gratefully. 

He took a careful look at the arrow in your leg, frowning with concern.

“Should be taken out by the healer,” he muttered. “But if it’s poisoned, we canna wait. Keenser!” he roared, bringing the green creature running. “Fetch me my extracting instruments and the little blue bottle in the medicine chest as well as some bandages. We need to get this nasty thing out of the lass immediately.” 

“Have you trained in medicine?” You asked, trying not to tense up too much as Keenser went to fetch the supplies.

“Enough to get by living away up here,” Scotty answered. “You're from Enteria, you say?”

“Yes. I'm a bard in training, but I do odd jobs here and there to pay for my schooling and instruments. Healer McCoy frequently hires me for long errands he doesn't have time to do himself.” 

“They'll likely be very worried about ye,” he observed, kneeling beside you and rolling up the sleeves of his bright red tunic. 

“I used Sending to let Leonard know where I am. He’ll either send someone or come himself if he can.”

“Very useful ability,” he remarked respectfully. “Now, lass, this is going to hurt a bit.

As he pulled out the arrow, you bit back a scream, hands gripping your balled up cloak with a white-knuckle grip. It hurt horribly, but you were extremely relieved to have it out and let out a gust of breath when you saw the arrowhead out of your body. Scotty immediately rubbed some of the ointment on the wound then wrapped it carefully in bandages. 

“I've heard about the Friendly rock gnomes who inhabit this area, but I've never encountered one before. Quite a nice home you have,” you told Scotty sincerely, who smiled sheepishly. 

“''Tis nothing,” he demurred. “It's but a hovel compared to my cousin’s abodes. Some dig out elaborate chambers that would put a dwarf to shame. Me, I prefer peace and simplicity to tinker away happily.” 

His beady blue eyes took on a far away look as he described his latest ventures in constructing useful devices and how he’d figured out the catapult. He had quite an inquisitive, bright mind that likes to solve problems and figure out how things worked and he had you in fits of laughter over his tales of some of the more hilarious failures.

“Where are my manners? I haven’t even asked ye your name yet!” he exclaimed at length. “Or offered ye any grub! My mum would be ashamed.”

“I’m Y/L/N” you told him. “There’s no need to worry about food. Leonard and my father are almost here.”

Scotty shook his head and opened his larder door. “Twill be a long trek home, though. It’s only right you have some sustenance.” 

He pulled out a loaf of bread and some jerky, which suddenly looked very appealing now that you were over the shock and adrenaline of the fight. While you ate, the gnome and his assistant stoked the fire, drew mugs of ale, and pulled up tiny chairs to join you. You were having such a good time, that you almost regretted the sight of your father’s concerned face when he arrived with the healer. 

“Thank you for your hospitality, Scotty,” he told your new friend. “I never thought I’d see the day when one can’t even venture into the forest without being accosted.” 

“Aye. Keenser and I’ll keep a closer watch out for these beasts. Something must be stirrin’ ‘em up, but I don’t know what it is.”

“The rumors are wild and unsubstantiated as of yet,” your father said. “But now that they have grown so bold, I can’t let you go this way alone.” 

Before you could protest he added, “I know you have much improved your combat skills, but twelve against one is not odds I wish you to risk again. If the healer needs more herbs, we will send fighters along with you.”

“Very well,” you agreed reluctantly, secretly not wanting to be surrounded like that again, but determined not to show it. 

“Looks like there’s no poison,” muttered Leonard as he examined your wound, muttering a spell to speed the healing process so that you could walk. “Should be right as rain in a few days.”

“Excellent,” your father declared. “Now, my dear, if you are up to it, we should take leave of this good gnome in order to be home before dark. My heartiest thanks once again, sir. I am in your debt for this.”

Helped to your feet by Leonard, you ran to the gnome and surprised him with an embrace, nearly swinging his short legs off the ground. 

“You’re the best, Scotty!” you declared. “I hope to come visit you again when I’m not running for my life from goblins.”

“And I you, lassie!” the gnome replied fondly. “Perhaps ye could play a few tunes then? Show off those bardic skills?” 

“I’d be happy too. Farewell, Scotty. Farewell, Keenser. Thank you for everything!” You waved as you exited the cave, sad to go, but pleased to find a new friend.


End file.
